Tank Talk

“What’ll we call this lot?”
“Who are they?”
“Dunno. They just showed up.”
“From?”
“The 77th.”
“In?”
“Tanks.”
“Don’t mention it.”
“No. Men. In bloody tanks.”
“Steady on.”
“Quite a few tanks, actually.”
“Effusive, then?”
“Enlisted.”
“And what, may I ask, are we supposed to call ‘quite a few’ tanks?”
“Isn’t it a Lanyard, or a Cotillion or something?”
“You’re thinking Second Corps.”
“So I was.”
“As you were.”
“That’s what I said.”
“Carry on.”
“Armoured Dragoon? Would that work?”
“A Dragoon? Doesn’t sound very tankish to me.”
“What about a Division?”
“A Division’s more than quite a few. Quite a lot more. In imperial measure it would be half a Redoubt. There’s not even enough of them for a Seconded Platoon.”
“What about a Light-something then?”
“Always a possibility. But there have been complaints.”
“From?”
“From, you know, who’s-it, the one between Fourth Brigadier and the Two-IC.”
“At HQ?”
“Expeditionary Command. First Salient.”
“Field azure with lion rampant?”
“The sister regiment, actually. Eighth Army.”
“Complaints about?”
“About all the Lights.”
“Can’t say I’m surprised. Women. Pansies. Low-fat bully beef will be next.”
“Squadron, then.”
“I beg your pardon. Did you say Squadron?”
“If memory serves.”
“Hello. Ground control to Major Tom.”
“What’s the matter with Squadron?”
“Not a thing, mate. Not a thing. Why not Flotilla while you’re at it?”
“They can be Squadron if they’re marines. Just like they can be Horse if they’re personnel carriers.”
“But I keep telling you. They’re not in Airborne. They’re in apcs.”
“In what?”
“Tanks.”
“My pleasure.”
“Men. In bloody tanks.”
“But can’t marines be in tanks?”
“Only if they’re Sappers. Or Snipers. Or something.”
“Mobile Dragoons then.”